Remembrances and Resolutions

So today I'm both reflecting on the notable highlights from my past year, and compiling a list of resolutions for 2013. First, the fun of 2012:

1. GISHWHES.
     If you don't know who Misha Collins is, please google him immediately then fall deeply in love with those bluest of blue eyes. Ahem. Allow me to interrupt your drooling for a second. In addition to be an incredible looking fellow and a good actor, he is also a decent human being. He created a charity called Random Acts of Kindness which encourages people to commit random acts of kindness in their own communities. The charity at large, raises money so they can go commit larger acts of kindness, like building houses for people in Haiti, still dealing with the fallout from the hurricane several years ago. He also is Weird. Weird. Weird. Weird. And that's where we get to GISHWHES. GISHWHES stands for Greatest International Scavenger Hunt the World Has Ever Seen, and this year, along with the boyfriend, one of my closest girl friends, her husband and extended family, and some random Scots and a Spaniard, I partook. GISHWHES' motto is "Death to Normalcy!" with a second emphasis on finding art in everyday life, and a third emphasis on random acts of kindness. A selection of the random things I did: made a pledge to commit a random act of kindness before the end of 2012, made a Jello snow angel on my kitchen floor, made an outfit made out of 21 different pieces of material and stood at "attention" outside the local post office, dressed up in only kitchen items and had a mock kitchen gear battle with my girl friend Drea, and perhaps my favorite, wore a dress made entirely of cheese and posed in front of a 1979 Lotus.
     GISHWHES was an utterly fabulous experience. It brought me out of my shell to a greater extent than I have been in a long time, and reminded me just how little I care what people think. I highly recommend participating in GISHWHES to everyone. And oh yeah, did I mention that the winning team gets a 3 night trip to Scotland to stay in a haunted castle with the inestimable Misha? My team didn't win (grrr...) but I have high hopes for next year.

2. The Tinsel Triathlon.
     I ran cross country and track in high school. My dad is a outside sales rep for a major bike company. When I was little I took swimming lessons, and was on the local swim team in middle school. So how is it that I never did a triathlon before this year? I finally changed that this month. I ran 3.1 miles, then biked 12 miles, then swam 150 meters. It only took me an hour and 21 minutes, and I was tenth in my age group and 383rd overall (out of about 800).
     Will I ever do another one? Hell yes! I have caught the tri bug now. I got such a sense of accomplishment from finishing this one, that I can't wait for my next one!

3. No Car Accidents.
     Yes indeed, this year there were ZERO car accidents for Alex which is a marked improvement over previous years. Perhaps I've finally become the sort of driver that my parents always dreamed I would be.

4. Formula Ford Race.
     The boyfriend races Formula Ford race cars and this year, November actually, marked the first time that he's raced since we've been together. I have a lot of misgivings about the whole racing thing, mostly because of the danger involved (shudder) but also because of the pile of money that he drops every time he goes to the track. However, I sucked those up and rode out with his family to Desert Center, CA (we stayed in Palm Desert, near Palm Springs) and watched my fellow race. Well, he's pretty good. Pretty damn good. He won both days and set a new track record for his type of car. I had a lot more fun than I thought I would, partially because of the people he pits with and partially because it's always fun to see someone you love kick some serious butt.

5. My Family.
     I have the greatest family ever, both extended (see experience 6) and immediate. It's just my mom, my dad, and me in my immediate family but I can't imagine anything different. My mom is my best friend on the planet and my dad couldn't be a better father. They make every year awesome, and 2012 was no exception.

6. The Annual Minnesota Vacation.
     In 2011, we didn't go back to see our extended family in Minnesota, mostly because I couldn't get the time off work. I took 10 days off in late August/early September and we escaped to the beloved homeland. My cousins kick butt, you guys. Especially my cousin who is a year or so younger than me. She absolutely rocks. I have no siblings, so having a cousin that's almost a sister is bliss.
     Minnesota itself? Brilliant. Make all the jokes you want (and don't you dare say Minn-e-soo-ta in that hateful way), but it's a pretty forward thinking place. Just this past year, they struck down two laws, one of which would make same-sex marriage illegal and one that would require I.D. when voting. They are way into progressive thinking out there. It's also gorgeous x10,000 and Minneapolis/St. Paul has a pretty fly music/art/theatre scene.

7. Supernatural Con.
     My best girl friend, her sister-in-law, and her nieces, all of whom I also did GISHWHES with, and I went to Dallas for a Supernatural Convention. Yup, the show Supernatural. I'm a little bit obsessed, especially with the older seasons, and we had an awesome weekend full of booze and dishy men. I got to put my arm around Mark Sheppard (Firefly, Warehouse 13, Doctor Who, and of course Supernatural) and Sebastian Roche (yum yum!). I met Mark Pellegrino (who told me I was "really pretty") and had a drink with Richard Speight Jr. (Band of Brothers anyone?). Misha Collins couldn't make it because his wife was having a baby (pssshhh...) but other than that, the weekend was pure perfection.

8. Learning to Sew.
     So for Christmas, my mom got me a sewing machine. You guys, I'm already sewing up a storm. It may make me sound like Ma Ingalls (Little House book series anyone?) but I can't wait to start making clothes for myself.


Resolutions for 2013:
1. Take more photos.
     I don't have nearly enough photos of 2012.
2. Run a half-marathon.
     I already signed up for one on May 5th.
3. Get healthier.
     Yeah, yeah, yeah. I don't have a real issue with how much I weigh, but I do need to start eating less crap food. You get out of your body what you put in.
4. Blog more.
5. Write more.
     I want to finish my novel that I've started and I want to submit some of my writing for publication.

Happy New Year (almost) everyone!

Legends in Our Own Minds

We all think we’re the heroes of our own stories. Some of us even think we’re the heroes of everyone else’s too. Regardless, we inherently see things from our own perspective. It’s like the age old joke about the actor who is cast as the gravedigger in Hamlet. He tells his wife that he got the role and she asks “What’s it about?”. He replies, “It’s about a gravedigger who meets a prince.” 

It’s human nature to focus on oneself, there’s no denying that. But what if we aren’t the hero of our own story at all? What if we’re the villain? What if the reader sees us, not as the plucky, though morally loose heroine, but instead as the scheming slut who seduces men, uses, then discards them? What if instead of the still hopelessly, sweetly lovelorn ex-fiancé, we’re the psychotic stalker, set on ruining life for the poor new lover? What if we aren’t the bold, brave hero striking off into the wilderness, hoping to “connect” with nature, but the dummy who gets lost in the woods and needs a rescue team to get him out? 

You shouldn’t ever worry about how others may see you or your actions, and that’s certainly not the point I’m trying to make with the post. With that being said, however, perhaps if we do or say something that gives us pause and makes us wonder what others might think, there might be a reason for that momentary hesitation. While the opinions of others shouldn’t consume us, when it comes to decision making, the reactions we expect from others can often be a good gauge of whether we ourselves are making a decision that may or may not come back to bite us! Hopefully this quick skip in our confidence can make us stop, even just for a second, and reevaluate what exactly we’re doing, and either reconsider our course of action or forge boldly ahead!

Warning: the next paragraph is somewhat of a rant about fiction writing and should be taken with a grain of salt and a sense of humor, or otherwise ignored.

On another totally related note, this consideration should also be used in creative writing. I’ve read far too many amateur pieces where you are expected to feel camaraderie or sympathy with a main character who is utterly unlovable. Just because the experiences and reactions may have been true to life does not mean they need to be recreated verbatim in your creative fiction. Those hookups that may have seemed so cool when you were in them? Well, they really make your leading lady look a *ahem* eager to please. Keep them in if that’s what your going for, but if not, use that handy pause that our consideration of the opinions of society gives us, and maybe consider a rewrite. 

Imagination vs. Real Life

For Jim Longworth, Don Epps, Fox Mulder, and Seeley Booth

I’ve never been very good at living in the real world. I mean, I am a productive member of society. I work, I pay my taxes, I shop for groceries, I have a stable adult relationship… but I get lost in my own head, in my own little world. I have a lot of down time at work and in that down time I read or watch Netflix. I get so into those shows, or movies, or novels, that I have a lot of trouble separating myself from them. For instance, I cried throughout the last half of the 7^th Harry Potter book. Not a big shocker really, but it affected me so deeply that I felt really quite depressed for a week or so afterwards. I have recently gotten into the TV show “Numbers” and if you haven’t seen it, I highly recommend it. Last night, I had a dream about Don Epps, who, for those of you who aren’t obsessed like me, is a FBI agent. It was a full on fantasy about him and I being in a relationship and working out some problems we’d been having lately. Weird right? The sad part is, that I felt so much happier in that dream than I’ve felt lately in real life. And yes, this does mean that I’m watching way too much “Numbers” recently and it’s time to get into something else, but I’ve had this happen before (see the dedication at the top of this post). I keep crushing on these men who are real in body, but whose characters and lives are totally made up for the boob tube.

I was feeling really low and embarrassed about this realization, until I started to consider my reasons behind these crushes. These men are not perfect (though they all have perfect looks), but their lives are exciting and complex and so much less “real” than my own. They don’t fight with me about doing dishes, or complain about cleaning out the cat box, or have bad breath when they kiss you in the middle of the night. That’s why these men are so appealing! They are hunky, successful, smart, bad-boys who defeat bad guys, and above all a mere creation of someone’s mind! If I were to go out with Fox Mulder (assuming he was real), he would be so obsessed with aliens and his sister’s disappearance that he wouldn’t care about what weird come-ons a guy tried on my today or how my knee is feeling after I twisted it last week. If Seeley Booth or Jim Longworth were my guys, I’d never see them because they’d always be off working with some gorgeous babe who I would be incredibly jealous of. If Don Epps was my boyfriend, he would probably compare my cooking to his mother’s and leave his shoes everywhere. My point is that these crushes are harmless and totally understandable, but I do have to be careful to keep things in perspective and not let my imagination run too far from real life. These crushes bring a smile to my face, and good dreams to my nights and that makes them important, but I have to remember to not let them become so important or desirable that they interfere with my reality. If they were real guys, they would have just as many annoying quirks as anybody else, and probably more.

Hm… on second thought, I could probably deal with Don’s messy habits and mother comparisons if I got to make out with that gorgeous face every night.  

Lemmings...

So my dear friend Karen recently wrote on her blog about how loathe she is to follow the crowd (check out her blog! http://karen-christina.blogspot.com/). I totally agree with her! She used the term "sheeple", which I love, though I also think of lemmings. So often we are lemmings in so many ways... just look at Twilight, Avatar, Pintrest, Hunger Games, moccasins, and Louis Vuitton. Being a lemming is rarely admirable, but I have a HUGE exception. KONY 2012. Yup. All over the Internet, blowing up youtube. Be a lemming. Seriously. Watch the video and make Joseph Kony the most famous man in the world. The more famous he is, the more people will care and cry out for justice. You watching this video, and sharing this video, and signing the pledge, and above all calling/writing/facebooking/tweeting your leaders and your celebrities will help take him down. The contingent of men and women the United States sent over in 2011, can't remain their without the support of the American people. This force is vital in training and helping the Ugandan military find Kony.

Brad Pitt who? Kim Kardashian who? I want the name on everyone's lips to be Joseph Kony. Here's the link to the youtube video:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y4MnpzG5Sqc

Here's the link to the website:

http://s3.amazonaws.com/kony2012/kony-4.html

C'mon... be a lemming with me. As Margaret Mead said, "Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it's the only thing that ever has."

wedding bells!

         The wedding bells have been ringing all around me lately! One friend was married in the fall, another is getting married later this week, and two more are getting married in the next two months! I'm trying to be in the wedding spirit, but I must admit to being a little shocked that they're all getting married so young! I'm twenty-two and I while the fellow and I have discussed marriage, engagements, etc., I'm not so sure I'm ready yet, particularly since we already live together. About a year ago, before the fellow and I reconnected, I wrote a short essay for my writing group entitled "The ONE". I'm putting it up here. It's very tongue in cheek so it should be read with a sense of humor!

The ONE

It seems like everyONE finds the ONE at the same time. So when is it my turn to find the ONE with everyONE else? What if there is no ONE? No ONE person for me, literally no ONE to be my ONE. EveryONE and their ONE are out looking at engagement rings and picking out colors. If not this, then merely delighting in being with the ONE they love. People who said they never cared about finding the ONE, much less marrying the ONE if he/she could be found are tasting cakes and sending me gushing text messages about bridesmaid dresses. Even those ONES who stick to their scruples and are opting for the increasingly traditional, non-legally binding commitment of living together forever have found the ONE and are sure that no ONE will ever separate them from their ONE. The ONE person they are supposed to spend forever with.

How is it that I feel like an old maid at twenty-two?

ONE friend who recently found the ONE told me that I should request the ONE from the universe, as if I am in a restaurant and the universe is the short order cook. “Hello. I’d like ONE vegan with blue eyes and a dazzling smile, extra brains, hold the immaturity, with a side of commitment please.” Yeah right. I’ve tried it. I’ve lain there at night in bed and said, “Please. I am ready to find the ONE. You know what I want. Please send him now.” When the ONE did not magically arrive, I lamented to the friend. The friend insisted that I was not being specific enough.

Patty Stanger is the Millionaire Matchmaker. She insists that she has an eye for the right chemistry and is an expert at helping people find the ONE. She gives advice to her clients telling them to make a list of five non-negotiables. Alright Patty, you’re on.

1. Brains. I am a snob. I admit it. I want the ONE to have brains out the you-know-what. The ONE would be college-educated in both something that makes a lot of money and something that interests me. The ONE would be an engineer who makes piles of cash by day, but who has his masters in art as well. The ONE would have the cash to fly me to the Lourve and then be able to wax poetic about all the Italian Renaissance paintings in the place.
2. Babies. I hate babies. I hate what babies turn into (toddlers). I hate the idea of pushing a baby out of my body. I hate the idea of what a baby would do to my body. Not every woman needs or wants to pop a baby out every two years. The ONE would understand this. And when or if my biological clock did kick in, the ONE would change a diaper.
3. Sex. The sex has to be good. EveryONE tells you that sex is not the most important thing, that sex can always get better, that you can work on your sexual relationship as a couple. Not true. If the sex sucks from day ONE, nothing will save the relationship. The ONE would do it right. (He would also make me a snack afterwards.)
4. Looks. In order to have good sex, the ONE would have to look good. The two are not mutually exclusive. The ONE would not have to possess bulging muscles and movie star looks, but he would have to meet certain standards. The ONE is never fat. When you are a little girl, dreaming of your wedding, the ONE walking down the aisle does not have a beer gut, nor does the ONE have a receding hairline, nor does the ONE have a face that startles (other people’s) babies. The ONE cannot be unattractive.
5. Commitment. The ONE better be able to make a goddamned commitment. I do not want any wishy-washy dithering from the ONE about how he feels. After six or so dates, the ONE and I would become monogamous. After a year, the ONE would ask me to move in. After a year and a half, the ONE would propose. After two and a half years, the ONE would meet me at the end of the aisle for a wedding with all the trimmings.

I have done the math. If I meet the ONE tomorrow, I will be married just before my twenty-sixth birthday. The ONE had better get his ass in gear.

All kidding aside, I am so so so happy for my friends who are getting married and I wish them nothing but happiness, beauty, and wonderful, love-filled lives and marriages.

Valentine's Day

It's February 14th again. I've never been a huge fan of Valentine's Day or a huge detractor. One of my many life mottos is: if it feels good, do it. I take the same view of Valentine's Day. I hate to be critical of a holiday that encourages love and romance, but by the same token, the eruption of red and pink all over the local CVS is rather nauseating. Therefore, do what feels good for you today. I know I will be!

The big plan for tonight consists of leftover enchiladas, beans, and rice from my cooking fest on Saturday as well as making little molten chocolate cakes with my sweetie. The restaurant industry, greeting card company, and lingerie conglomerates can all enjoy the holiday with some other couple.

Just so you don't think I'm too world weary however, I did snap a particularly charming photo of my favorite rat man, Johnny Winter, this morning. He looks like he's waiting for his Valentine!

Charmante!